Tuesday, March 31, 2020
We don’t set our alarms anymore which has been a huge adjustment for Nathan especially who would typically get up for work around 4:00 AM. We are going on week two of him not working. He is a site supervisor for a construction company that builds high end homes and remodels and while many construction type companies are claiming to be “essential”, his company made the decision to shut down for a month, for the safety of their employees and families. I have been able to maintain my employment as an office administrator for our church and continue to work five mornings a week.
The kids began online school and it has given them some much needed structure in their day. Anders was especially excited. I think he really missed teachers and friends.
A lot of people have expressed concern over Anders and Carson, them being in the high risk category for Covid-19. When the governor made the announcement to close schools in Wisconsin, I was relieved. As a mom to two boys with cystic fibrosis, I am part of several CF support and chat groups. The moms were all buzzing about what to do with their CFers. “Any moms pulling kids from school?? I’m worried!” It gave me anxiety just reading the various posts.
Anders already had 26 absences due to illness, doctor appointments and hospitalizations. It was a rough winter. And the week leading up to school closures, he was taking around 45 pills a day, including 4 antibiotics for GI issues, strep and influenza A. The anxiety of falling behind in classes and missing out socially was making him physically sick as well. It was a battle every day to get him to school. Having the permission to keep him home felt extremely reassuring, not only for me, but for him. It took about a week, and his digestion issues subsided, his cough decreased, his energy came back, daily nausea and vomiting diminished. Anders has been the healthiest he has been since the fall! He went from being sick every day since December, to feeling well physically, mentally and emotionally. He even gained a pound, AND we have been able to back off on some of the medications! Hurrah for quarantine! We were concerned that home school would be difficult with his ADHD, but he is loving it! We are grateful for all of the different ways to learn.
“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Ella is a different sort of personality. She has had to give up quite a bit in this whole process and there has been some grief. The day before things started to unravel, I had just taken her and some friends prom dress shopping. There were so many fun things to look forward to! The track and field season was on the horizon, our long awaited Spring break trip was approaching, Ella was preparing to turn 16 and earn her driver’s license, and she looked forward to a mission trip to Peru in summer. Now, all of these things are up in the air. She is handling it with grace and understanding and hasn’t complained once. I suppose it is a comfort to know that everyone else is going through it with you. But the unique thing is that this has never happened before in our lifetime. There is no manual for any of this. No textbooks in history to guide us in our current state. How do we handle it socially, medically, economically or physically? It’s all new. In a world full of schedules and events, we can’t plan on anything right now. It’s all out of our control.
For my girl who has always been an organizer, enjoys making lists, calendars, and goals for the future, it’s hard. There is a lot of letting go. But, we’re all in this together. And ultimately, God is in control.
“In their hearts, humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.” Proverbs 16:9
Carson, like many high school seniors, has graduation on the horizon. Home school allowed him to complete his school career in mid-March. We had planned to celebrate over Spring break as a family in Florida. His graduation open house was planned for Sunday, April 5th, and then he was to move 6 hours north to take a position with a well-known fishing resort at the end of this month. It was going to be his dream job! Of course Coronavirus interrupted all of this.
Our trip to Florida was cancelled, and his graduation party needs to be postponed. But I just couldn’t pull the plug. All week long I watched events being cancelled and it has been heartbreaking. I tried to think outside the box. The idea of a virtual party came to mind when I heard my neighbor mention she “attended” a memorial service on Facebook. But I decided against it. (This is so weird!) But a few days later I saw something about a wedding ceremony on Facebook and I thought, “You know what? Yes. We can do this.” I pitched the idea to Carson of a 15-20 minute virtual party with a short slide show, an interview, cake and presentation of his diploma, all LIVE on Facebook and he liked the idea! So, we’re doing it this Sunday. With the hope that eventually, we will be able to have a real backyard open house this summer or fall.
“Let us not give up meeting together (even if it’s virtually), as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Hebrews 10:25
This week, we were thrilled to find toilet paper at Walmart for the first time in two weeks! (No, we hadn’t run out yet.) Also, I treated myself to coffee and a breakfast sandwich from 3 Arrows Coffee. No more do we go inside and socialize with friends. Being in groups is no longer allowed and staying 6 feet apart is recommended. (CF families are all too familiar with this protocol.) Now, we order take-out from our phones, and wait in the parking lot for our order. I ache for small businesses that are doing everything they can to remain open.
For supper today I decided to make a full out thanksgiving dinner. I’ll admit, my motivation really ebbs and flows these days. I go from telling my family to “just make yourself a bowl of cereal” (for breakfast, lunch AND dinner,) to deciding that it’s freaking November and I’m going to brine a turkey and make a pumpkin pie. Why not? It gave us all something to look forward to. Anders was excited and set out the fancy dishes and lit some candles on the table. And for the rest of the week, we will have yummy turkey leftovers for soup, and sandwiches. Totally worth the effort.
Overall, quarantine is miserable, and goes against our human nature. But I’m trying to think positively. In the last two weeks, my family has eaten together more times than we have in the last 3 months! We’re communicating more, (arguing counts, right?) playing games together, getting yard work and projects done, spending time outside and trying new things in the kitchen. Ella even learned to make homemade peanut butter cups! (We are also gaining weight.)
Most important, we are learning that this isn’t just about us. By staying at home, we can do our part to protect our community and beyond.
Philippians 2:4 “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”